Guns Don't Shoot People; Dick Cheney Shoots People

In an effort to prove that the Bush Administration is firmly in support of both the 2nd Amendment and tort reform, Dick Cheney exercised his right to bear arms by shooting a lawyer. Back when he selected himself as Bush's running mate the news agencies all agreed that Cheney would lend some "gravitas" to the campaign. It seems that lately there is more of the "grave" to Cheney than gravitas and by now it should be clear to most intelligent people that Dick Cheney is a horrible person.
The five deferments he received during the Vietnam War so that he could continue a mediocre academic career were just the first clue to a life that has been all about looking out for number one. What ever happened to the days when we could at least pretend that our public servants had some noble calling to foster the common good? Like too many of our politicians, Cheney is the perfect poster children for rampant self-interest. Everything he and his boss have done in office, from the obsene tax cuts for the rich to misrepresentation of the situation in Iraq, have been calculated to increase the wealth and power of themselves and their pals. The private hunting ground where, out of shape, rich, white guys can shoot nearly tame birds is the perfect metaphor for the world Cheney wants.
Wrong as it might be for those of us members of the proletariate to find satisfaction in a hunting accident, there is something of poetic justice in the thought of members of the over-privileged class turning guns on each other. I am sure it must have been tramatic for big Dick though. I have little doubt that as the army of doctors who stand watch over our vice-president's inadequate heart were rushing to the aid of the fallen sportsman, an army of spin-doctors who stand watch over our vice-president's inadequate spirit were just as busy. Oh, to be a fly on the wall when the conversations about how to handle this delicate situation were being made. There are certainly some questions that need to be answered. Why did it take so long for the news to get out? Would the White House even have let the news out if they hadn't been asked about it first? But really, is there anyone out there who actually needs these questions answered?